We Create Core Memories

A one margarita limit, a grown-up friend dinner, and a five-year business glow-up all lead to the same question: what changes when you finally let yourself become the person you’re building? We’re reflecting on how Homemade Events ROC didn’t just give us a career in event planning, it gave us community, adult friendships, and a new way to measure a “successful” life through memories instead of milestones on a resume. 

We share the real origin story behind our service-based business, including how we didn’t even choose entrepreneurship at first. Someone saw our gift, pushed an opportunity our way, and that single yes turned into parties, systems, an LLC, and the slow confidence it takes to say out loud, “I’m an entrepreneur.” If you’re searching for small business motivation, women entrepreneur stories, or what it’s like building an event planning business in Rochester NY, this conversation is packed with honest perspective. 

We also get into the standard we hold when we’re trusted with once-in-a-lifetime moments, from first birthdays to 50th birthdays. Planning doesn’t have to be boring, celebrating yourself matters, and the best client experience is built on care and consistency. If you’ve ever felt like your job had no purpose, this will hit. 

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Music Track: Building Dreams by Aylex Source: https://freetouse.com/music Copyright Free Background Music

Transcript

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Episode 150 Tease

Barb 0:15

Episode 149.

Lyssa 0:20

We're almost there. And we have figured out what we're going to do for episode 150. I know. Ahead of schedule. One whole episode ahead of schedule. We have figured it out. So just be ready for that because that is gonna be dropping real soon. All the deets. Have

Water Now Margaritas Later

Lyssa 0:39

fun.

Barb 0:39

So what's in your cup? Water. Because we are going to a very grown-up friend dinner.

Lyssa 0:50

I know. I'm so excited.

Barb 0:51

We were invited to just come and hang by Sarah Joy. Yeah. And I'm loving it, right? So we're saving our margarita for later in the evening because I'm not out here trying to drink. I know what happens when I drink two margaritas. So we're pacing ourselves. That's an episode, right? Yeah. One margarita. We take a limit. Yep, we do. We have a one margarita limit now. And that's okay. And that's okay. Um, I also love that it kind of ties into what we want to talk about, right? We met Sarah Joy through the business community. Yeah. Just, you know, seeing her, supporting her. Marketing, all the things. All the things. And now we have this connection with what once was a stranger. Yeah. But like now I love her so much. And now I'm so excited to go to her house and eat this home-cooked meal. And everyone's kind of bringing a piece to the dinner. And it's because we decided five years ago, hey, let's start a business.

Lyssa 1:52

That part. That part. And I'm so excited too for the just the timing of it, right? The way that it always lines up. There were a few different days that were available for us to do this. And it just so happened that it landed on the day that her episode uh here on the podcast is dropping. So that part just feels like what a fun way to like celebrate this friendship, celebrate this relationship, and just have a little bit of fun, you know. Like you said, this is our, it's not our first, you know, but like, I don't know, we just didn't do these things when we were younger. Like we just didn't do them in our 20s. We were working, we were moms, like we were living completely different lives in our 20s. And we didn't live this where you just go over to your friend's house and they cook dinner for you and and you share margaritas, and one person makes desserts and one person makes drinks and the other makes dinner. Like, to me, that is so cute how it like all came together. We all brought something together and we're gonna share a meal together later. And that's not something that we did enough of, you know, in our youth. And I love that it is coming into our owl season. Uh I love that. You know, that we get to live this life and build these relationships so intentionally. So I am, I'm excited to go spend our evening with Sarah Joy after we record this amazing podcast about how amazing our lives are now.

The Business That Changed Everything

Barb 3:14

And that leads us to starting this business, right? At the end of the day, starting this business changed our lives. It was a huge step forward into our evolutionary journey. And something that we've found we're sharing more now, right? Like we're I'm hearing the story, and I'm I'm like, oh yeah, that's right. We did do that, or this and that. Yeah. I guess I'm not that I'm not sure why we're sharing the story. The story should be shared over and over again, but I'm I'm in awe of the story every time I hear it. So let's hear it again.

Lyssa 3:58

It was fun. We just one of the things that we got to do recently was be a part of this like photo shoot with a photographer, a local photographer. And she asked us, right? Like she asked us the questions and she tells us, like, how did you get here? And I think the one thing that I love is that our story starts so far into the past, you know? Um, and there are many episodes, I feel like on this podcast now that talk about our love story and how it started in fourth grade. But I think the biggest piece that was really fun to talk about really was the beginning of business because most people choose this for themselves. Most people say, I want to start a business. I want this for me. I want to be my own boss. And it's not that we didn't have those feelings, but it was never us that said, let's do this. It was something that was thrusted upon us. So the responsibility came to us, the thought came to us, the idea of, hey, you have something very special that you should be sharing with the world. You have a gift. No one had ever told me I had a gift before. And I love that that's how our journey begins. It doesn't even really have anything to do with the business. It was someone seeing us for the first time and telling us that we had a gift to share with the world. And we just so happened to share that gift through a service-based business called homemade events. And what a journey it's been. Like five years ago, someone told us this and gave us an opportunity to throw a party the way that homemade events would throw a party. And then that party led to another party and led to another party. And slowly but surely, we just accumulated systems. We accumulated an LLC. We accumulated a bank account. We accumulated all of these things that go along with a business. And we were in business for what, like a year, a little over a year before like we actually did it, right? Like just complete womanhood in there, right? We needed proof of concept, like living in our feminine. Like, there's no way that I'm gonna make this real if it's not really real. And then it was right, like a year in, we were like, I guess it's real, right? We've been doing it for a year now, things are going pretty good. Um, and like what what a journey, what a journey that it has been to be able to say, I didn't even choose this for myself in the beginning, and now here I am sending in paperwork to the state of New York so that way I can have an official name. And then doing all of the other subsequent things, you know, that kind of come behind the scenes. And now when people ask us, you know, what we do, there's such a flow of like, oh well, I just I create core memories. That's what I do now. I couldn't say that five years ago. That was something that it didn't exist. Five years ago, I was just starting a business. Five years ago, I still had a corporate job. And I remember not even saying that I was an entrepreneur. That took time. I didn't own that title. That took a long time to own. And ultimately, I don't know where I was really going with this, but it it's such a a reflection to be able to go back and see where you started, right? Like she, with one question, how did you guys start? All of a sudden, the last five years of my life just come flooding back in a very fast time lapse, you know, in my brain. And it's fun to be able to go back there, to see it from the beginning, tell the story, get people, you know, caught up, and then tell them all of our new dreams that we have, you know, and how it's not not stopping here. Um, that is probably one of my favorite things that I think we do now with networking, you know, and being able to go out and meet new people. Just like meeting Sarah Joy, you know, being able to do that. I wouldn't have thought that I would be the person that would kind of make an adult friend. Because our story starts in fourth grade when I had found my best friend. I found the person that I need for the rest of my life. And so to like be on this cusp of like making adult friends and like building this life and building these relationships, and it all started because I chose to start a business. I can't say that I would have been this person if that's not the path that we chose for ourselves.

Turning Purpose Into Play And Art

Barb 8:55

100%. We the journey, the growth journey, the self journey, it all meshed together. And that is something that, you know, always forever grateful to Mama Adele for seeing that because we didn't see it. We were doing it, we were living in our bliss as we were doing this for our friends and family without even the smidge of awareness that, hey, like this is it. This is the thing that you're supposed to be doing. Yeah. And she gave that to us. She gave us a gift of awareness, and we took that gift. And I feel so responsible to live that gift out because you gave me something that not everyone gets. You gave me a nugget, a gem, something that sparkles so bright. And I get to wake up every single day and like love that gift so much and do my very, very best because I do love it. We love what we do. And people are always like, Wow, you really do love what you do. And I'm like, no, yes, I really do love what I do because while we are unlocking other people's core memories, we're unlocking memories for ourselves. That's a play day for me. That's the best kind of play day for me. In my whole day is with my best friend in the car, driving from here, driving from there, and having fun and laughing and putting things together that blow people away. That is the best.

Lyssa 10:40

It's just the best feeling ever. It's like an art class, right? Like who hated art class? I'm gonna say literally no one, right? Like that was your opportunity to go play, to go do whatever you want, to be able to color, to draw. Like there were just so many vessels that you could choose from. And it was always the best class. Who did you love the most in school? Your art teachers, right? They were the coolest fucking people. They were chill, they were down to earth, they were real with you. And it was just the place where you got to express yourself. And what we do is art. We get to do our art with each other because that's the relationship that we've built. And now I get to express that every time that someone chooses me to unlock their core memory. I get to create art for them with my best friend and live my best life. And the result of that is something beautiful for another person. Say less. I just get to go and do the thing that I love to do in this world, the imprint that I love to make, and it makes an impact on someone else's life. And I don't think that I need anything else. I remember being in my corporate job and saying, I have no purpose here. I serve no purpose. I'm selling printers. Like, what impact does that make on people's lives? And now I hold a space that carries so many people's memories. 80th birthday memories, 50th birthday memories, sweet 16 birthday memories, baby showers to first birthdays. Like all of those memories are housed inside of my venue. To me, that is a purpose. And I want to fulfill that purpose every single day. And I get to have so much fun doing it. There is nothing fun about sitting in front of my computer and answering emails about when printers are going to be delivered.

Barb 12:40

Like nothing. Never, never, not once one time wasn't it.

Lyssa 12:42

What a fun day that was, you know. Never walked away from that. And now I get to wake up, have photo shoots, set up some parties, and be with my best friend from dawn till dusk. That's the best day of my life. No, literally, the weekend was perfect. It was so good. And we got to kick off August in just the most classic Arlisa living their best homemade events lives. Like it was, it was just freaking fantastic. Like through and through, all of it.

The Standard Behind Core Memories

Barb 13:22

I'm grateful. I'm grateful that we're here, right? I'm grateful that we stuck out the hard times. It wasn't that long ago. I remember singing the sad songs and the roller coaster that is business. And we love it, right? With the lows come highs, and we are riding high. We're getting to share our story. We're getting out there. We're meeting new people. We are trying new things in business. And I want to say that out loud because I'm proud of us. The journey of the last five years has has been it has just been wow. And I know that we still have such a journey ahead. And I want to be proud for us because we're learning and we're growing and we're taking in as much as we can because we care. Yeah. Because there is a standard here. Because I care about your core memories. I care about how you intentionally celebrate with your family. I care about what we're building. And it's not all fun, but it's all worth it.

Lyssa 14:39

Everything is worth it in the end. These are once-in-a-lifetime moments, right? You only turn 50 once. You only turn one once. Like these are periods of time that you just you don't forget. And I'm never gonna take for granted that how you feel at your event, you will never forget it. I know that and I carry that through every single event, through every single client, everything that we do, from the freebies all the way up to the highest paid event. It doesn't matter to me. I have a standard. And my standard is that this moment in time will live rent-free in your brain for the rest of your life. And no, 100% perfection is the only thing that I shall accept. It's the only thing that I shall deliver because that is what that means to me. I know that I would want someone else to care about this moment for me the way that I care about it. So at the end of the day, I just cannot. Every single year. And you know, we're sitting here and we're like, what is the standard? What's the homemade event standard? That's the standard. We asked, or we didn't ask her, we told her, right? Like, thank you. Thank you for now number five. Thank you for this fifth event with you. Because like it really means so much to us every single time we see your name come through our system. And she was just like, Well, I wouldn't think of anyone else.

Barb 16:36

That's the highest compliment I literally have ever gotten in my life. When she said that to us, because it was so genuine, it was so honest. And we did it,

Trust Community And Celebrating Yourself

Barb 16:48

right? What is our mission? Is to build trust, is to build community. And that means not only with the vendor community, but that also means with our clients. I want to be your friend. I want to be here when the kid turns five and 10, and then all of a sudden, oh my God, they're graduating from high school, right? Like that, that matters to us. The story matters to us. The fact that you are building a life and you want to celebrate the achievements along the way matters because that's something that we didn't do enough of for ourselves and decided, no, we will change that for our children. Yeah. Because celebrating yourself, if you aren't doing it, who is? No one's out here giving you letter awards saying you're the best, right? Like that stops at school. Yeah. So if you don't learn how to celebrate you, who the hell will? Exactly. And if you are leaning into celebrating yourself, let's do it. And I want to make it the most fun, amazing experience from beginning to end, not just the party and the beautiful setup that we have, but the planning. Yeah. Planning doesn't have to be boring. Guess what? We plan all day long and it's fun. It can be a fun process. And that's what we're here to share. We're here to share a gift and making that gift enjoyable and relatable. And yeah, there's some parts that are not going to be so great, but like stick with me because at the end it's going to be so worth it. Yeah. That's that's essentially what she gave to us is that you you are worth it. You've been worth it every single year. You outdo yourselves every single year. It's different every single year. And it was, yeah. It was like such a I wanted to I know right through the phone.

Lyssa 18:47

Um, it was. And it was so nice, right? To get there and almost like just be so familiar. Be part of the family. We knew we knew everything. Yeah, like all the things coming in. And so it was like even just unloading, right? We're like, we have a system, we know how your house works, we know how to load in and out of your home. So it was like pulling up and just being able to knock everything out, get everything in the house, and then yeah, and then like talk to you, like your family, because I've watched your kids grow up. And like, here is this party that I did four years ago for your little baby that now I'm doing another event, and she's not a little baby no more. Like she was so big. And, you know, there were new animals in the home, right? Like, oh, I don't think these were here last year. Did you just get these guys? Like, are they new to the family? Like to have these conversations and be able to build that relationship with her. Like that, that was really cool. And then, you know, we we do our thing, we leave, and she did it. She was like, I think this was my favorite setup yet. Like, this was like the best one. And I have no doubts that at some point next year something is going to come up and she will send in her inquiry. And like, I am beyond grateful for her. I'm beyond grateful for that relationship. And it is, it's just such a testament to what it's like to give us that trust because we will not take it for granted and we will make sure that not just one, but all of your memories are going to be very beautifully curated each and every time, uniquely to you. And I I don't know, I just I love that this is this is what we do for a living. This is our lives, this is our career, this is how we create a difference in the world. This is how we create currency in our lives. This is how we show up for ourselves, for our community, for our children, for our family and our friends. Like I embody my business everywhere that I am. And that has set me up to just be like a whole different standard of person. That like I didn't, I don't want to say I didn't know existed. I'm sure I knew it existed, but like never did I ever think it was gonna be me. You couldn't see yourself in that role.

Year Five And Owning Entrepreneurship

Barb 21:12

And I think that that's the shift that we're feeling. I if I had to you just said it and like I felt it in my tummy, yeah, that's it, right? We we are now embodying what it means to be a business owner in year five. It was cute in May when we're like, yeah, we're five, right? Like it was cute because celebrate. We were. Yeah, that was the moment in time we can backdate it and do all the things. And sometimes those feelings don't come until a little bit after. You have to go through some shit and realize some shit in order to be able to fully embody. Yeah. And I do feel like we're doing that. We are entrepreneurs. We've shed the title of this is my part-time thing, or this is my side hustle, or I'm, you know, I'm I'm searching and I'm trying really hard to make this my main hustle. That that's in the past. We are entrepreneurs, period. That's it. Because going forward, I can never imagine not being an entrepreneur. So this is it for me. And how lucky, how lucky do we get to be that we can sit here and know that 100% with 100% certainty, this is it for me. And it is the best ride ever.

Lyssa 22:31

Ah, this is so good. It does feel pretty good. It does feel pretty good. You're right, you're right, you're right. I just want to let that wash over me now.

Where To Follow And Connect

Lyssa 22:40

Uh, so I feel like this is gonna be a good place to love and leave our friends because it does. It feels so good. So, this is the part where you're gonna do all the things. You're gonna like and follow and subscribe. You can follow us on Instagram and YouTube at Mark's Mindset Podcast. And if you're local to the ROC and you want to party with us at Homemade Events ROC.

Barb 22:57

Until next time, buddy. Thank you, kick you, thank you. Look at us. I'm the liver girl gangster.