Margs and Mindset

Content Day

Barlyssa Lopez Season 1 Episode 142

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0:00 | 29:51

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We thought we were hosting a simple content day for vendors to get fresh brand photos. What actually happened was a full-body reminder that community is the real growth hack, and that the best business strategy sometimes looks like a room full of women telling the truth over good food.

We talk through how we pulled this off fast (three weeks fast), why our masculine energy had to carry the logistics, and how the feminine side still showed up through creativity, openness, and play. The biggest surprise was watching vendors who had never met connect like they already belonged together. The conversations quickly moved past marketing and into real life: motherhood, balance, identity, fear, excitement, and the courage it takes to start a small business. If you’re building in Rochester, NY or anywhere else, this is a real-world look at why finding your people early can beat years of grinding alone.

We also share the behind-the-scenes details that made the day work: arriving early to settle, letting nature set the tone at a Lake Ontario property, and creating space where nobody is stuck in emails or client fires for a few hours. Then we give flowers to the kind of photographer who does more than “take pictures” and actually holds space, documents confidence, and leaves a lasting thumbprint on a brand.

And yes, we end with the funniest disaster of the night: one last thing to take off the wall, one chair, gravity, and a snap that still hurts to laugh about. If this hit home, subscribe, share with a friend building a business, and leave a review so more people can find Marks And Mindset Podcast.

Music Track: Building Dreams by Aylex Source: https://freetouse.com/music Copyright Free Background Music

Tropical Sips And Big News

Lyssa

Episode 142. This mark looks good today. So I'm just gonna jump right into what is in your cup. It is giving mango.

Barb

Yeah. It's very orangey and I love it. It just smells it smells. Oh made like pineapple. Very tropical.

Lyssa

Okay. Salute. Salute.

Barb

That's so good. Mmm. This is like a what's a pin? It's not a pinion colada. It's uh your Malibu thing. Oh, the Malibu and pineapple. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Something like that. Well, it's delicious. It is delicious. And well deserved. Because we did a really cool thing. We did, we did. And in true classic Barlisa fashion, we're here to talk about it because we didn't know how cool it was until it was actually happening. And then we were like, oh, this is really cool. Yeah. So let's get into it. Let's get into it. Content day.

Lyssa

That's it. End of podcast. Until next

The Fast Build And Real Impact

Lyssa

time. Um, our content day. Safe to say that I wasn't ready. Um, and I think while we were building it, because we did it so quickly, it really was like a very quick turnover for this type of project. You know, we just didn't process it fully. We were focused on the logistics, making sure that this was gonna be a great event for us and for our all the vendors that wanted to participate. And so it just didn't really grasp on the impact that it was gonna have, not just on ourselves, but just also on the community. I wasn't ready for that part. And I feel like lately we've been talking a lot more about like our masculine and feminine energy. And I feel like in this project, while it was definitely birthed from feminine energy because we wanted to just get creative and just have fun and just like do something um for funsies, that was definitely birthed from there. But because it was such a short timeline, like our masculine kind of had to go into hyperdrive a little bit, and we had to like get all the logistical things out of the way. We had to plan it and execute it. So like there wasn't any more time for the feminine to lean into that and like, why are we doing this? What is you know, what do we want to get out of it? Um, so I think we were kind of just focused on that and focused on the pictures and making sure that the vendors had a great time, and I just wasn't really prepared for the vendors having such a great time.

Barb

Yeah.

Watching Community Form In Real Time

Barb

It's it's like one of our favorite things to build community. Yeah. To build, to have a hand in building an experience for people, obviously, event planners. That's like where we hang our hat. And then to have it be a community of your peers, right? People that understand exactly what goes into what it means to put on an event for someone or you know, someone curated. It's it's crazy. It's crazy. And why didn't we think about it? Because we were, we had to do it, right? We were in it, we were in the thick of things, and to have the honor to bring everyone to that table and experience the dinner and hear the conversations and see the connections being made in real time. Oh my God, what's your instant? Like, I want to follow how long have you been doing it? Genuine questions of how do you balance, how do you do it as a mom, as a wife, as a person. It was my heart is still so full.

Lyssa

Yeah. It's just the cup is really overflow with gratitude because while we brought all these women to the table, it was their openness, their willingness to be vulnerable. They they wanted to share, they wanted to connect. It was like everyone in that room wanted to be in that room around that table. And that type of energy just amplifies, right? Like that is literally just pure joy and fun and love. And I think like that was the coolest thing for these women to meet each other just hours before, and then sit at this dinner table and really connect over food and over their wants and their hopes and their dreams and their kids and like what's happening for them. And it was such a moving moment. And we've been doing this for a while now. So I think we have understood now that we did build a community and that we have the ability to do it, but I've never done it with the awareness now that I have. So to kind of sit at that table and take that back in the moment, that was very gratifying. Yeah.

The Calm Morning On The Lake

Barb

So we had this amazing day. I love that what we gave ourselves, right? We we left little nuggets throughout the entire day. And again, classic, classic Barlisa style. We got there early and we had about five hours to ourselves before anybody got there so that we could settle. Yeah. And I'm so proud of us for doing that because from five years of running a business, we've learned that we do better when we get to settle, settle first and do what we need to do and get ourselves mentally prepared for what we are about to do instead of just getting there and getting to work. Yeah. Because that feels energetically like that, just is a different experience. So we did that. We integrated, we ate breakfast on the lake.

Lyssa

I know, just sitting out and watching the lake. I what's funny is I haven't posted it yet, and it's probably gonna be in like a hundred reels. But I have gone back. We did this what two days ago now, or only two days removed from this. Um, I have literally watched that video like four times. Like I'm just going back and looking at it because it's just such a moment, right? To be able to just sit in the calm and give ourselves that moment of peace, like looking out onto the lake. What a beautiful fucking property were we at. Like WBC Vacations. It they have a lake house out in uh Williamson on Lake Ontario, and it's the most perfect view. It's just the most beautiful backyard. And to just sit out there, listen to the water, watch the sunrise up, and like get ourselves ready for the day at the same time that nature is doing so. Like it was like this harmony that we were building. That was so I am so grateful that we gave ourselves that space to just take in what we were about to do that day because it started perfectly. And I think that's exactly why it ended perfectly for sure.

Barb

So we did that, we had breakfast, we slowly moved into you know, unloading Judy because my girl was stuffed again.

Lyssa

Another classic Barlis. Not us trying to like get more stuff in there, though. I'm like a little sad. There was one more thing I wanted to bring, and then I didn't need it, but like I wanted it.

Barb

It was the question of do you think this would what do you think?

Lyssa

We were we were like to the ceiling. We we maxed out space in Big Booty Judy.

Barb

And I love that. So, you know, we unloaded, we settled, we started working our magic, we we did the things, and then the first vendor came.

When The First Vendor Arrived

Barb

Yeah. And I think that's when it hit me. When she came and we had that first interaction, we're talking, you know, she's sharing about who she is. This is the first time we've ever met her in person. Yeah. Um, it has been an Instagram, right? Friendship and connection. That was like, okay, right. After we had that exchange and she left, I felt the this is what we're doing. I didn't even know that this is what we were doing.

Lyssa

And it was amazing. Yeah. In my head, I was truly only seeing the masculine side of it. I was very excited for all of these people to come together in this event to be able to get pictures for marketing and to get pictures for their website. And and to get like a lot of these women had never done that before. And so I was very excited to be able to like give them something that they can put into their business to help them grow. And I was looking at the tangible item of the photos being the thing that we were giving them. And I think that we gave them something so much deeper than the pictures. And I wasn't ready for that. I didn't, I wasn't prepared for that part of it. I was like, oh, I see what happened here. I see how this came through organically. It actually made me think of our goddess gathering, our retreat with Shanna, right? Because we had this idea of like what it was gonna be, and it ended up just being like this sleepover. You know what I mean? Just like this really organic sleepover. And and there's always like this through line of who's meant to be in the room and who's meant to be at the table. And I just felt like that once that first one came through and she was telling the mom story and telling, you know, the starting story of how she just needed to do this to feel like her again, and hearing all of, you know, the excitement that she has behind starting her own business and like doing this for herself and and the excitement that she had about being a part of this event and like the gratitude for us, you know, doing something like this for her to be a part of and asking her to do it. Like, all of that was like, okay, everyone who's here today is exactly who's supposed to be here today. Like, there is going to be this through line of we are all here at the same time in the same place, doing the same thing for a reason. And that was that moment of like, okay, this is the reason. We have

Stepping Away To See Bigger

Lyssa

to go.

Barb

And then that domino led into the rest of the day and where everyone came and you know, we had time to learn and do and be, right? It was a again, something I didn't realize until today. It was a moment where it took you away, right? How important we have learned. I'm gonna change that. We have learned the importance of being removed from the business. You actually know you must remove yourself from the day-to-day operational emails, inquiries, project management, QuickBook management, right?

Lyssa

Like all of the things you have to pull back and breathe. Yeah. And even from your environment, I want to add that in too. Like just you need to be pulled out of your office, out of your storefront, right? Like every once in a while, you have to get plucked away to be able to see yourself differently and see your that 30-foot view of yourself and your business.

Barb

And we provided that, right? It was a day where no, no one checked their phone, no one answered any emails because this is what I'm doing for my business and me today. And today, hopefully, has inspired everyone, right? And you go back home and now you have all of these creative, juicy ideas and things that you, you know what? I heard somebody do this, so I'm gonna do that, or I'm gonna, you know, I'm reach out to this person so that maybe we can get lunch and I can pick her brain a little bit more. And that again, that little nugget we picked up, and I'm gonna hold it in my heart forever because it's really, really cool. This is exactly what we wanted in the beginning.

Lyssa

Yeah.

Barb

If we could have had a supportive, right, just a real group, I feel like we would have thrived. And we, it's not that we didn't thrive, right?

Lyssa

Yeah, it just would have been a better story. I think it's that we did find them, right? Like we found groups now, um, in like year four and and five is like where that happened. And so that is what I loved about even the very first person that came. She's like, I just started this. And then the next person came, I just started this. I just started this six months ago, I just started this a year ago, right? Like they were all so new into the business where I was grateful, right? Something that we found our own way and took us three, four, five years to understand this community thing is what has actually helped grow us more than any marketing and Google SEO could. And that was where I was like, oh, we are giving them that step ahead, right? You're doing this now. Yes, find your community at six months into your business because that is what's gonna help you thrive and go so much further than we were going in six months because we didn't have that yet. And that was really cool to be like, okay, this was my purpose. I was here to help all of you understand this concept that took us three, four, five years to learn. You have now learned it in the first six months of business. And like, what a gift. What a nugget.

Britten’s Photos And Holding Space

Barb

And to have Britten be a part of the project, she's the perfect person. The person to capture and document in still photo everything that happened that day was like the cherry on top. It truly, truly was a cherry on top. I there was no one else. No, there was no one else that could do it except her, and she did her damn thing. And I love watching her do what she loves to do, right? Like that was the thing with everybody because we got there early and we got to set up and do our thing. Yeah, we also then got to watch observe, yeah, everyone else do what they love and you know, the attention to detail that they have. And or I did this because, you know, this inspired me and to hear the magic that they put into their business was amazing. To watch her, right? We've been on the opposite end of the camera, but to be able to just watch her do her thing, it's I think that's really cool. Yeah. To be able to watch appear do what they uh love.

Lyssa

Yeah. It she's holding space. She was holding space for so many people. And in a way, when she was holding her camera, it was like I physically saw her holding that space for every single person. And that is so beautiful and like such a gift that she gave to everyone. And you could tell how happy she was, and you can tell that she genuinely enjoyed doing that. And so it was this really just this moment of bliss, right? When you see someone in their element doing exactly what they're supposed to be doing, right? They're they're happy when these people are on the basketball court going back and forth, winning championships, right? Like they're happy. And that's what she was when she was outside with these freaking mamas uh against the lake. Like you could tell that she was like, I don't want to stop. Like, I think she could have been there all night taking pictures of those women because she was just in her full element, and it was beautiful to see. And that is something that is gonna come through in those photos, and it's gonna mean so much to these women. She is gonna have such a thumbprint in their business now because of the photos that they're gonna get back. And again, I think that's beautiful because I think Britain has a beautiful thumbprint that is gonna help build this next generation of businesses that are popping up here. And there's no better way than to support local than to literally put your thumbprint on that business to say, I'm here to support you.

Barb

And that's what we did, and we didn't even know it until today, until right now, I didn't even think about that, right? There's there's just so many things, so many things from just experiencing. And I'm glad that we experienced this. I'm glad that we took on a challenge in three weeks to turn something around, and we did it, and we showed up and we showed out, and everyone had a positive experience. Everyone took away exactly what they needed that day to fill them up, to fill their cup, and we did that, we had a hand in that, and I'm proud of us. We have to give ourselves the kudos because while looking back, I'm like, was it that hard? No, it was challenging, right? We we kind of rode the struggle bus on Tuesday, things were popping up, and very late. The stress and all the things because this does it does matter. We do care, yeah. We care so much that even though Tuesday happened, I would a hundred percent do it again. Thousand percent. And I think we should. I think we need to. I think the experience and the whole opportunity for everyone, like everyone is is asking us to do it again. And I think that too, right? I'm gonna put that in my confidence deposit and I'm gonna let it drip in because it was so impactful that you are excited for another one. That means something. Yeah.

Lyssa

I mean, that's how homemade started, right? Somebody at our very first event was so excited about what we pulled off that they said, oh no, you need to plan my party.

Barb

Yeah.

Lyssa

And we're out here doing it again. That's crazy.

Barb

What a crazy what a timestamp that this is gonna

The Chair Broke And We Lost It

Barb

be. Um, but I do want to shift. I want to shift into a funny story. I do, I do, because it deserves to be told. It deserves to be told. So we do, as event planners, are typically always the ones that get there first, right? Because that's that's our goal. Yeah. And we are in fact the last ones to leave because I have to make sure that everything is picked up and then everything is packed, and then guess who has to pack it? That was a whole nother fun game. So, you know, we've saw everyone out, we've started loading Judy, things are moving, and we realize there's still something that needs to come off the wall. Yeah. So I get on a chair and I proceed to take it off the wall.

Lyssa

I am there next to you. So that way I can help take down the one side and like hold it as you're pulling down the other side. Um, because we we want to save it. You know, we don't we don't want this to like rib it's a Puerto Rican in us, throw it away. What do you mean? We don't do that around here. Not around here, partner. Not around here. Um, so yeah, so I'm there, I'm kind of helping, and you are stretching. Um little baby stupid arms are stretching. Grab the last one. And I I just remember just like reaching up and I was gonna like it was there, it was on the tip of my tongue. I was gonna say, I can get this side. Like, because you saw me stretching my little stupid baby arm. I did. It was not, it was a beautiful arm. I love that arm, and it stretched all the way up until it came all the way down.

Barb

So the chair moment split from under me. And then what happens? Gravity took over.

Lyssa

Gravity came into play, and then you got chopped in half by the chair, and then you wouldn't stop laughing. And I thought you were dead.

Barb

So I love that the same thing happened, right? We were in the same room at the same time as all of this was happening, and we moved two different perspectives of different stories to know what happened to you. Your perspective. I'm on the chair. I'm stretching my stupid little baby arm as far as I can. I know I can't reach it. At some point, you know, right? You can gauge on whether or not you can reach something. You've had these arms, right? I've had this arm my whole life. I know. But I'm like, if I stick my tongue out, maybe it'll get a little bit closer and I might reach it. I fucked around, I found out. The chair, I feel the chair like slip, right? I feel the chair slip from under me. And I'm like, oh shit, this is it. I fucked around. I'm about to find out. Oh my god. I then get hit with gravity and I fly to the floor and I chopped the chair in half. So we did break a chair, and I am, I've never wished I didn't. didn't do something so much in my life. And I've done a lot of crazy shit. But I would have to say that this does go to the number one. I wish I never did. I wish I got down. I wish I gave you time to say I could reach. I just wish it ended differently. But here we are. I'm gonna tell the story because it didn't end differently. It ended this way. I chopped the chair in half. I died laughing. So yes, I guess I did die, but it was so funny to me. There was nothing funnier that I had ever seen in my whole life than me coming down and chopping this chair in half. And all I see is you standing over me with your arms stretched out, looking like Mother Teresa with the most concern I'd ever seen on a person's face. I'm so glad you weren't there at the water park when I got hurt because you would have died. Because you were so scared for me. I've never, I felt it. It's just, it was so funny. It was so funny. I couldn't stop laughing because you were you're you said to me, stop laughing and tell me you're okay.

SPEAKER_00

I saw it a little differently.

Lyssa

So you are stretching and you are trying so hard, and I see the tongue come out to give you those extra inches that you really need in order to get there. And I also knew in that exact moment that that it was not enough. And I reach up and I'm gonna say something, and I hear it. I hear like I'm looking upward because my hand is completely focused on the corner that I need to peel off. My hand is already up, your hand was already up, you know. So I am in the upward, you know, direction, looking towards the ceiling and come down. All I sudden, I hear the chair slip. I know it. And then I try to turn and grab you.

SPEAKER_00

It's too late. And then I just see you get chopped in half by this chair. I'm like, oh my god, my best friend is in two pieces. This shit is crazy.

Lyssa

Like, we were perfectly fine. Everyone's gone. The party's done. This is literally the last thing we gotta do. And like right at the end, she's just a goner. Like, I can't go on. Immediately, I just couldn't, I couldn't go on. And then you're just laughing hysterically. And I'm like, you just got chopped in half. It can't be that fucking funny. Like, I know you are hurt, but please tell me you're at least okay. Like, do I need to go find my phone? What kind of situation is this? I really just needed to assess the situation as the one that did not just get chopped in half by a chair.

Barb

And all I could think about, other than wow, she loves me so much. She's so concerned. Never seen someone more concerned. Second thought was I can't believe this wasn't recorded. I can't believe that the funniest video moment that we would have had to enter. I know. It was not documented. Because ask me if I want to do that again. No, no, no. Do you know the bruises that I have on my 37-year-old's body? That's right. So impact happened. We gotta move

Bruises Regret And Girl Math

Barb

on. There's still shit. It's like 9:30, almost 10 o'clock. So, you know, we got things to do. The body's like, all right, we got things to do. The next day, yesterday, yesterday, I was like, oh no, is this what it means to get hurt at the old age? This is trash, right? I've not been seriously harmed in a very long time. Knock on wood.

Lyssa

Yeah.

Barb

And this is frightening.

Lyssa

Yeah.

Barb

Yeah. I'm I'm nervous.

Lyssa

I mean, you came down on a chair, and like I saw just snap in half.

Barb

So it happened again. I never wished for something to not happen. So I never wished for the power of the flash to run back in time and just slightly, I didn't think, I don't even think it's gonna change the timeline that much. No, no, no, no. Because it's a chair, right? Who's gonna miss a chair? The timeline would have been cool, but alas, I don't have that power. I have immense regret and sorrow and really black and blue bruises to prove how sorry I am. If it's any consolation, I have a constellation of bruises going up my back right now. Every time I pull my pants up and down to pee, I'm like, ow. Ow.

Lyssa

Because it's it was like right on your waist. Like literally, you were chopped in half. No, the chair was chopped. You were chopped in half. But then that was that was like the psychic part too. I was like, oh my God, I didn't want to send this email. You know, like I didn't want to do it. I didn't want to do it.

Barb

I swear I didn't, I never intended for that to happen.

Lyssa

It's one of those, what was again, as an entrepreneur, as a venue owner specifically, like we, these are things that happen. Like shit like this just happens. So I I was trying to come at it with that, you know, perspective and be like, I just really hope that she's understanding, you know. And um, of course she was, which we had no doubts, but we were like, I just hate, I hate that I have to be the one to tell you that I broke your chair. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. I wish I could take it back. I was trying to justify it though. I was like, well, what if she really wanted new chairs? And then now you're here, you're gonna be like, and like she just didn't have a reason because she was like, Well, these chairs are fine, you know? So, like, I don't need to buy new chairs, but like now one of them is not fine. So, is that an excuse to buy all new ones? I think so. And that is called a woman's justification line.

Barb

Girl math. I love it. Uh, but yeah, that's that's kind of how we ended. We packed up the rest of the car and we drove home living in bliss, buzzing from the day.

Gratitude And How To Follow

Barb

And thank you. Thank you. Thank you for helping me pull it off. I couldn't have done it without you. I want to thank you. We we'd be doing some crazy shit. Yeah, and we always be surprising ourselves, which is so you know, I don't get it. But thank you.

Lyssa

Thank you for picking me up. Always we wanted this to wake up some creative juices and be able to just kind of do something for us, and we did that. And the cherry on top of doing something for our community just really made it that much sweeter. 100%. I loved it. Love you, partner. Love you. All right. Well, this is the part where you're gonna do all the things you're gonna like and follow and subscribe. You can follow us on Instagram and YouTube at Marks and Mindset Podcast. And if you're local to the ROC and you want to party with us at Home Made Events ROC. Until next time, bye. Okay, baby dogs. Your turn for attention.